4 Corners

Every once in a while... I get to enjoy of monumental mommy moment that will forever be impressed on my forgetful heart.

Today I cried --- and I NEVER cry!

let me back up...

Never in my wildest dreams did I ever imagine myself as a homeschooling mama.

For many reasons-- not the least of which is that I'm a public school teacher!

I've questioned our decision to do it this year... more times than I can count. Some days I just feel like they didn't "get enough"... and I should have been more patient... Yada, Yada.

Yesterday the 3 oldest boys had their end of the year testing. And when my "most challenging" son came out of test within about 25 minutes... I cringed. When my "Genius" child came out, half drugged because of his allergies and said, "I had to just guess on a few mom, I can't even breathe. I just wanted to be DONE." I rolled my eyes and thought, "That's just great - Some teacher I've turned out to be!".

BUT the kicker was having to wait an extra 2 hours, wondering "WHAT IN THE world??? A test that was "supposed to take all of an hour, ended up being more than 3 hours, and when the poor guy came out, he said: Mom... IT WAS SOOOO HARD--


I was worried. BIG TIME!

Worried that I hadn't done enough.

That we hadn't made the right choice in home schooling these boys.

But as it turns out...

I cried today...

Not because my "genius" child made "tremendous growth" ... He's always done that.

Not because my "smart" and "challenging" wonderboy increased his percentile scores more than he's ever done before. He's the kid that learns "inspite of," not "because of" how good his teacher is. He's lucky.

I cried today because my baby boy who has struggle EVERY day of his life in school... and has always been YEARS behind in school (which was why this journey even began)... Not only did he improve from being in the bottom 5 percentile in EVERY category on the STAR test for the last 3 years, even after being retained...

BUT because he scored IN THE 90 - 97 Percentile in EVERY subject--- which means he's ABOVE grade level... and in some areas... more than 2 years ahead!!!

SO YEAH...

I cried today for the first time in... FOREVER... because,

maybe, just maybe...

NO HOMEWORK + NO PARENT PROJECTS = ACADEMIC success after all!

Thanks MOM!!!

BECAUSE WITHOUT YOU>>> It wouldn't have been possible!

I love you!

Are You Kidding Me???

I remember worrying about my son starting middle school and all the pressures that go along with living through those middle years. But at the moment, I'm thinking I'd be happy with the worries of zits, girls, and lockers.... instead of GED tests and College.

Today I met with yet "another" 6Th grade teacher to discuss options for my oldest son.

WHY? Because I'm not sold on the ideas that his other teachers have given me for him.

They want me to get him hooked up with all these on-line courses, college prep materials etc.

Yeah, let's just SKIP JR. HI ALL TOGETHER... and while we're at it, we can forget high school too. Who needs dances and sports and proms?

Basically, they don't think I'm "pushing" or "challenging" him enough. And guess what, they're right... if you consider success based on production of work.

I'm not sold on that idea that I need to push him any more because I'm not sure he's ready for that. Not just because he's not interested in becoming the next boy genius (and he's not), but because life if more than just acquiring knowledge.

Ironically (because I'm a teacher), academics aren't a big priority around here. It's more about teaching them to love God, know God, love family, and love sports. * not always in that order.

At our consultation today, we were encouraged to have him take the GED test within the next few week, and begin classes at the JC this summer to see how well he'd enjoy taking classes there in the Fall.

He's already passed the high school exit exam as an 11 year old. Yeah, the one they give to 18 year old seniors before they graduate. His lowest score in any sub category was a 94... so I'm thinking the GED wouldn't be too hard for him.

But, WHOOOOO.... ARE YOU KIDDING ME? G.E.D? COLLEGE??

They want me to have my kid skip 7th grade, 8th grade, as well as his Frosh to Senior year of high school... just like that???

Again, ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME???

He just turned 12 for Pete sake ... like, yesterday- literally!!!

He's a baby. He has no business being with kids that much older than him! He's mature in some ways, but life experience counts... and he just doesn't have much of that. He's a VERY young 12 year old in a LOT of ways... and I LOVE that about him. I love that he'll do whatever we ask him to do, he'll go where ever we ask him to go, he'll BE whatever we ask him to be. No questions asked... he just does it! Usually with a happy heart because he trusts use implicitly!

What a treasure that is! What a responsibility that is!

Oh, that I don't let him down.

There are a million questions racing through my mind. What about sports? What about friends his age? What about trying to get him to appreciate this God-given gift (which HE SO DOESN'T see as a gift)?

I wish he'd have come with instructions.

A recipe I could follow.

Directions I could read, understand and abide by.

After the meeting today... I felt like I'm really letting him down as his mother. I HATE THAT FEELING!!!

As I prayerfully consider what's best for him, I don't feel any closer to knowing what that looks like, or sounds like, or feels like. I'm painfully aware that what I'm doing now is probably not enough... but REALLY...

And as much as Jr. high and high school wasn't all of my fondest of memories... I can't imagine just "robbing" him of the experience all together.

My hubby thinks we have to at least consider it because that's the advice we've been given by so many different professionals, and friends who know him.

I...

I just don't know.

THOUGHTS ANYONE???

Can You Imagine

The year before last, I was blessed with a very bright, sweet, wonderful little girl in my class who has forever left her mark on my heart.

She was every teacher's dream. Motivated, loved learning...

Her "mother" was just dropping her off at school a couple of weeks ago. I remember noticing that she didn't 'look' like she felt too good when I pulled into school behind her.

Long story short... her mom died yesterday.

They only had a little time to embrace the news.

She told me on Friday that her mom "didn't even know who I was last night, so I just pet her hair and try to get her to take a drink. It's already that bad."

But as I hugged her today, I realized just how difficult "forever" is to grasp for a 9 year old... even as bright as this one. I know I certainly can't grasp it.

What can you do?

Except run home as fast as you can ... and ever so thankfully hug your own kids, and wonder why you are so blessed to live the life you have!

Definitions

This is how we "define" math and social studies in first grade while he's at home with Nana...Nana makes it easy... and fun... and wonderful! That's how it "should be."

But then the other days of the week, this is what the definition of school looks like...

The little yellow word book is what I use in my first grade classroom during Language Arts in my class (since I'm still teaching 3 days a week).

I had to "graduate" to the Webster dictionary to accommodate my 3rd and 4Th grader... but I'm good with that (usually). After all, I'm a "teacher" for Pete sakes; a college grad with a couple of science degrees and 15 years of teaching experience (But my hubby would point out that I've only taught Kinder and first... so as to explain my anxiety about trying to teach geometry and science to a brainy kid).

BUT now that Kyle wanted in on this "home schooling adventure" too... I'm a little more stressed.

His "definition" of a dictionary is this....
(and yes... he actually uses it!)

When he was little... his idea of a great "rainy day game" was looking at "his" book and finding new words to try and trick his daddy with.

(Notice I said daddy... not mommy. He said he only liked to play that game with daddy because he "likes a challenge"...humph! and then I took his blocks away... because he started that when he was about 4!)

So, the real "adventure" of me starting to home school all 4 boys is really just beginning!

This week we just tried to figure out logistics... Like why it's not going to work for them to call me while I'm at work 47 times to ask if they can have a "recess" yet.

We'll see...

The one good thing... not having a school payment for the first time in 8 years will be pretty awesome! Whatever will we do??? (I'm thinking we may need to save it for the counseling services we may require if this doesn't go as well as we hope!! Hahhhh)

home schooling... REALLY?

I distinctly remember thinking that "hell would freeze over before I'd ever home school any of my own kids"...

but apparently I'll be buying the next round for the entire populous in Hades... and soon!

We started homeschooling AJ in September for the first time... and since he loves it so much, within 2 months he convinced his 2 younger brothers to drop out of school and stay home with him. They all love it... and it's amazing how much they can accomplish!

As of this afternoon, the 3 of them have convinced my oldest son to get home schooled too!

BUT... wait!

I agreed to home school my 4th grader because it's the best thing for him.

I agreed to home school my 3rd grader and 1st grader because that's easy and the school they were at wasn't nearly academic enough. They REALLY wanted to get home schooled, and AJ enjoys having his brothers around to play with (most of the time); so we're doing it.

But, I'm REALLY hesitant to teach my middle-school son at home!

He's the "perfect" child... the "perfect" student... the "perfect" built-in tutor...

but the truth is... he's already smarter than I am in all the core subjects; and I'm not really sure I can do a good enough job...FOR HIM.

I don't know how we can tell him no though.

He's crushed because he thinks that I'm "trying to convince him to stay in school."

I just want what's best for each of them; and I wish that I knew exactly what that meant for each of them---

because by the time I finish paying their food bill for the next few years, and 4 sets of braces, and insurance for them to drive etc... I really don't think they'll be much left over for any counseling that may be need because I screwed up their education!

ha

Wonder no more...

If any one's been wondering why I haven't had a chance to post...



Reason #1... (not really... but look CLOSER.... then laugh, and you get the idea!)
CAN YOU GUESS WHICH BOY IN THE FRONT ROW IS IN MY CLASS???

# 2 We've beeen working on http://aj ...





# 3 It's football season...



and being the home team takes practice...lots... and lots of practice!


Most importantly... my baby has been gone this week... and I MISS HIM almost more than I can bare.

So... of course... I decided in at the last moment to redo his room (again) for him, before he comes home -- TOMORROW!

He better love it... or his daddy is going to shoot me!

Let's Make a Plan...

I knew this would happen once school started...

My house would start to look like this...
(This DRIVES me crazy... more than anything else... I HATE it when my house is a mess)

*Maybe I should just be happy that I have a camera that can capture the dust so well???

or NOT!!

And then there's my sad roses...
I knew my beautiful roses would start to look like this once I started school... because I just don't have time to get to take care of them like I do when I'm not teaching, and homeschooling, and enjoying football and baseball 6 nights a week.

And this is how my scrapping is going...
which is to say... it isn't. And that little "gift" I've been working on for a friend... it's just killing me not to get if finished and sent!!

What I need is a plan... to get it all done.

But then I just recently discovered Facebook... AHHHHHHHHHHH...

and hooked up with my long-lost roommates from college... and one of my bridesmaids that moved across the country.

Tony told me to use my air miles to go for a visit!!! (Gosh I love him-- maybe I should get him a birthday gift after all???)

AND now I'm thinking I don't care so much about the yard and the "unfinished projects"... because I'm ALL about "planning" AJ's next field trip.

YEP... I'm thinking that's a great plan!! A trip to DC...

We'll see... but in the meantime... the plan is to clean the house; because I can't "plan" with a dirty house!

Added Addictions

I have issues.
Surprising, I know... but I'm addicted to lots of things.

* spending time with my boys
* shoes
* music
* books
*scrap booking
*shopping...

and that's only some of the things I'm addicted to.

This summer I've added blogging and Facebook to my 'ever growing list of addictions'.

Today I've discovered another one...

a really huge one...

My FAVORITE one of the moment... is my new Nikon D60!!

I'm in L.O.V.E.

I mean, really in love, with this new toy!!!

AND THAT...

is why I needed to watch 3 videos this afternoon (just to figure out how to turn it on)...
instead of getting my son ready for his baseball game (so he showed up to catch without his catcher's gear, with the wrong team shirt on--- but he's lucky I even got him there-- because that's really daddy's job since I'm supposed to be across town at football practice.)

and why my house may be falling down around me in the next few days....

and why my kids may not eat healthy food for the next several days...

and why I am in HOG HEAVEN...

and "ANOTHER REASON" why my husband is THE GREATEST!!!!

I finally got my camera... just in time to take some great photos when we go down to Newport beach tomorrow...

just in time for the Dodger game in LA we'll be at on Saturday.

just in time to take some fun football pictures this season.

SO...

as soon as I figure out how to use this wonderful new thing... I'll be back to blogging... with some cool pictures I hope!

NOTE TO SELF:
I also need to nail down the details of our poor children's schooling for next year... preferrable before the first day of school on Monday...
so I might need to take some time to do that soon (since Tony can't be bothered with "stuff like that"... it's all about priorities Baby.

I also might want to consider working in my classroom sometime between now and ... say, tomorrow! Since I'm running out of opportunities to do my classroom before school starts next week. ahhh

I told you all I needed a longer summer break....

I Need A Longer Summer Break

Everywhere I look, and everywhere I go - I'm being reminded that my summer vacation is ever so quickly coming to an end, and that school is starting... soon! Too stinkin' soon I tell ya!

I've been in denial for too long.

I've been avoiding the sale aisles for supplies, reading blogs rather than checking my work email, and generally trying not to think about all that needs to be done for me to get my classroom ready for school to start in a few days.

I'm just not ready for summer to end! My boys aren't ready either.

This summer has been great because I've felt like this year I was actually able to "vacation" during our summer break too. I've been able to enjoy time with them during the day, and still spend time doing things I enjoy at night. The boys have different friends sleep over all the time, and they go night swimming or play games all night... just having a good 'ole time. But reality is fast approaching.

That means less scrapping --
and no more staying up late since we can't sleep in --
less cooking (because I just won't have time to do recipes that require the bread to rise 3 times, or onions to soak in buttermilk for a couple of hours...)

It will mean less blogging too!

YIKES... My thoughts are that we had "better really enjoy this last week of vacation and live it up." Right??

But daddy thinks we need "to spend this week getting back into a school routine." You know, get them to bed early every night, wake them up early every morning so they can be ready to go by 8am.

He thinks this helps them "get ready to start school" so they're not too grouchy.

I think it just makes them grouchy... and ME GROUCHY... a week before we need to be grouchy!

But, since it's not "me" getting them up and ready at the crack of dawn (because I'll still be sleeping and enjoying my last week of vacation) ... I'll be ever-so sympathetic to my poor boys if their daddy does this to them.

I'll try to be understanding, and patient, and not get upset with all their whining... but I have a feeling... it's going to be a long week for me. I can tell already... because daddy is in there giving them a lecture right now about how important it is to "get back into school mode."

He's trying to explain...

ummm-

Yep, I've got to go save my poor hubby! "His" boys... are now being referred to as "your mother's boys"... that's usually not good.

ERRR...

My long week is starting early.

Never, ever say "Never"

I just got my job-share teaching contract for next year in the mail.... which means....

Not only will I continue to teach first graders 3 days a week like I've been doing, which is what I absolutely LOVE ; it also means that in a few short weeks, summer vacation is over and school begins for my own boys.

Since we decided at the end of last year that the boys wouldn't be returning to the private school that they were at, we really need to nail down what the plan is going to be for next year. It's a much harder decision for me than Tony because I just "NEVER" thought they would ever go anywhere else. BVG was not only just their school, it's also where we go to church. The church that I've gone to for the last 30 years! I just "NEVER" dreamed that my kindergartner wouldn't graduate at 18 as a Senior with most of the same kids he graduated from Kindergarten with at 5, just like I did. I wanted that for them... and I'm sad that it's not going t be like that for them.

But... God has a sense of humor... a way of bringing you to a place where you never thought you'd be... just to show you how very little control you really have.

My 4 boys are so different... in so many ways... not the least of which is apparent with their needs for school. So, in our effort to do what is best for them individually...

Kyle wants to stay at BVG another year... so for now, we've agreed. (ahh, my baby... in Jr. HIGH... urggggg)

And although all three of our boys actually got into the new charter school that we've be praying they'd get into... we've decided that only our first and third grader will go.

But my fourth grader... daddy's little all-star... my little wonder boy... He "gets" to be home schooled.

cough, gasp... ^(*^(%*()_...

WHAT???

I 'always' said that "I would NEVER" do that... but; here I am ... eating that phrase; yet again.

I'm notorious for having to eat those words... (You'd think I'd learn, and stop using it!)

I said I would "NEVER" marry Tony.
I said I would "NEVER" live in Mo Town.
I said I would "NEVER" home-school!!!!
The year Kyle started school, AJ was in pre-school across town, and the 2 little ones were at 2 other places and I DISTINCTLY remember swearing (usually with lots of tears) that I would NEVER, ever agree to anything that committed me to going 4 different directions in the morning before work.

The list of things I said I'd NEVER do could go on forever--

But, here I am... and I'm praying that I'm doing what's best for each of them; because the truth of the matter is:

The older the boys get, the more I realize that life isn't about convenience or ease. For me or for them. The decisions we make for our kids shouldn't be about what 'we' want for them, but by what we know will be best for them... even if that means I have to do things I said I'd NEVER do.

AND... I hope that when my kids are deciding what old folks to put their father and I in when we're not-so-old, but very senile... I hope they NEVER forget how much I love them!!!

To School, or Not to THAT School???

Last night was open house for the boys, and I usually love to go; but last night I only went by sheer force of will because I'm just so tired. But we went, and I was disappointed in having made the effort because most of the work on display for the night was more "parent displays" than work "my boys had done." I've mentioned before my 'love' of parent projects, and am admittedly biased against them. But last night was ridiculous! You should have seen some of the work that some of these parents did! WOW, it was amazing, incredible... over the top in the extreme (And 'we' would definitely not be in that group). Let's see, there was the science fair projects "we did"- and the Whale diorama "we did" - and the Farmers community "we did"... etc-- some of the stuff displayed was truly amazing... but let's face it-- I can assure you that 99% of what we saw at open house was NOT done by 8,9 and 10 year olds! Weather displays with little pullys that drop dry ice in containers to show fog... ummm- it was REALLY cool, but... when the kids aren't even allowed to touch the stuff, pretty good indication that he wasn't allowed to participate in completing most of the project.

Either way, Tony and I oohed, and ahhhed at all the appropriate times... and patted them on the backs and told them all how proud we are of how hard they've worked this year... and then Kyle, in all his infinite wisdom- says : "Mom, that was just like a show the teachers have to put on. It's more like a competition for the parents to see who did the most work and spent the most money on all the projects they made us do throughout the year.

(Yep.... entirely too smart for his own good - that one!)

We helped a little on these projects, but I've told all the boys..."I've already had the opportunity to learn all this stuff, and I love you too much to rob you of the opportunity to experience this fantastic educational experience... so it's up to you to earn the grade you want because we're not doing it for you! (Which is code for "I already passed 3,4,5 grade - now it's your turn because I didn't much care for it the first time I had to do it- and I'm certainly not going to do it again. You're on your own kid")

Anyway... I will say this for Open House - what it REALLY means is:

School is almost done and Summer Vacation will be here in 12 day!!!!!!!!! YEAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

ahhhhhhhhhhh

I just got a new student in my class and her name is : (Honest to God, I checked the CUM to make sure that was in fact on her birth certificate -- because surely parents can't be that.... Cruel? stupid? or ...? )!!!

Juanna Margarita ______

AND that,pretty much sums up my week!

Does that just say it all?

Teacher vs. dad vs. mom

So I just got "another" call from one of by beloved son's teachers. It was not a happy mommy moment for me because it wasn't one of those, "your kids great calls. It was more, "he just doesn't seem too interested in school calls." Maybe it's because I'm a teacher myself, maybe it's because my boys go to a private school where my family is very involved... maybe it's just pride- but for whatever reason... calls like that just kill me.

Let me just say, HE GETS IT FROM HIS FATHER... ! And Tony will be the first to say that, albeit with a grin on his face.

My son also has his father's talent for sports, and right now couldn't be a better time to use baseball as an incentive to get his act together in school, right? Well, that depends on who you ask. But, since I'm the mom... I think it's a perfect plan. Apparently, his teacher, teammates, and coach/dad... they're not so sure.

Tony talked to the teacher that morning (he just happened to be there working in the kinder class with Caden), and told her that he'd "talk to him about being better." He apparently didn't get the message clear enough for dad, because he got in more trouble later on that day. By the time I talked to his teacher at about 3:45, I let her know that he wouldn't be going to his 11-12 year old team practice from 4-6, and furthermore... at his game that started at 7 he would be sitting in the stands with me. (She could hear the crying already... so she ever-so-graciously says, "Mrs. Mac, he was 1 of 6 kids that had a rough day today - and you're the only parent that's punishing your child."

and that matters because??? Well, my son's just lucky I guess; because HE knows better.

Well, coach daddy had A REALLY hard time grasping the concept of his "star player" missing any game time.

As luck would have it, his brand new bat came in the mail today and it 'was really important that he had a chance to use it at practice today." Sorry hon, not today!

Game time came... daddy comes to the stands... "um, have you decided if I can put him in the line-up? Rachel, It's really not fair to the team for him not to play in this game."

hmmmm. Dear, he's 9. He'll live, I know this is taking years off your life... but truly- not starting in 1 game will not kill him! And after all, this is about what's best for him!

Out of love for my darling, I did let my son eventually go in the game... after writing an ever-so-sweet "kiss-up letter" to Mrs. S assuring her that he "would be a stellar student until the end of the season." (He meant til the end of the year, I'm just sure of it!).

To which, coach daddy was SO happy, as he did wind up winning the game for his team!
"Yep, he might not be the best student Rae-- but boy did you see that boy hit and pitch tonight"


AHHHH.... and with that wonderful thinking dear, don't be surprised if YOU have to talk to his teacher again (because, it kills me)!

Guilty Again...

One of my all time favorite girls from last year told me last week that her 'mom' is "very sick again because her body doesn't like the chemo that the doctor is making her take." WOW, I said, "I guess you need extra hugs today." To which she said, "no, we're OK. She's used to it."

The next day... another student's dad died on the way to the hospital. He was shot the night before from 2 gunshot wounds fired when he answered his front door.

The amazing thing... these kids just come to school the next day... as if it's just another day-- because in their world, it's just another day. It's not a novelty to have this kind of drama unfold in their lives, it's all they've ever known. I was struck yesterday by the fact that they don't even know to expect something different, something better for themselves... UNBELIEVABLE.

And then I go home across town to my relatively 'perfect life'... and feel very guilty that I'm as blessed as I am-- and pray I'll be more thankful and content for all that I'm blessed with!

Didn't I already pass 5th grade?

I love doing stuff with my boys... except those dumb school projects (K-1 projects are ok... chicken adventures and all). But am I the only one who hates doing state reports, mission displays, whale dioramas... and science fair projects? URGg. I have 17 baseball practices and games scheduled in the next 5 days alone... so doing 'projects for open house' won't be a high priority at the Mac house. (Which means we'll show up at open house and I'll hear "and she's a teacher." To which I'll say... 'his daddy did this one with with him.'

Yes, Mrs. BR... but you should see him hit a ball!

Here's "chicken" after another Kinder adventure at our house. He's worn out too - but mommy did the journaling this time... so no potty shots. They all liked daddy's bathroom adventure better... even Mrs. O. --

WHAT is that?

This... this is what I did today- and believe me... it wasn't on the to-do-list.

Well, it's not what I 'actually' did today... but isn't a picture worth a 1000 words?

This is Caden's Kinder class mascot. Each kid takes chicken home for a night to journal about a special adventure. The ONE night my ever-so-funny husband helped with the homework, and this is what we get (and now you know why I get to do it all --except math. I only teach 1st grade and I'm not 'smarter than a fifth grader- especially with math.)

Anyway, before 'this teacher' could edit her darling's paper... daddy glued the picture down and wrote some 'terribly funny' adventure. urggg.

How embarrassing is that? I'll tell... I thought the teacher would be livid... but she loved it, and the boys are still laughing, and... it's perfect for me today. Because... today, with only 14 days until we host Easter... I was going through pictures and found this. Instead of doing the 37 things that I should have been doing... because I'm the world's worst procrastinator.

And this, this photo pretty much sums up what I got done today! Why was I doing this? Because there's so much to do... I don't know where to begin. And... I guess I work better under pressure. So, me and chicken (when he's finished of course)... we're just going to stop making 'to-do-lists' - and maybe go play golf!

Just One More...

Tony has always wanted a little girl... and EVERYONE who knows him... knows that. But unlike him, it's a passing thought for me. I really only wish that we had one when I'm out shopping, or when a great song comes out, or when I think; maybe, just maybe... we could have Just One More because some &#(%*%$ people really do NOT DESERVE TO BE PARENTS! I mean... they don't even deserve to inhale oxygen to sustain their own lives... much less anything else.

I had to fill out more paper work on a little girl (one of 7 children in this particular family) because ... she NEEDS TO BE PULLED OUT OF THE HELL she currently lives in.

Mind you, her "biological" DNA donors are already in jail for their last"great parenting efforts." But what does our great system do, put them with "relatives"... who continue the abuse. So now, the children are split between "other relatives," where the neglect is so profound... they make the DNA donors look like the 'lesser of 2 evils.' WHY is that? Is that really the best we can do?

I know you can't save them all... but in this case... I really would just like to have "one more." But that's not even good enough because there's 4 older kids (3 in another town), this girl's twin sister, and a young toddler who also DESERVES TO GET OUT OF THE HELL THEY LIVE IN...

Tony get's frustrated because I can't just let it go... I just don't know how!

BUT DON'T YOU LUV THE CINDERELLA SONG?!

report cards

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

hate report cards!!!
When I was a kid, I hated report card time because it usually put my parents in a bad mood. My grades were fine, but it only takes one bad report card in a family to ruin it for everyone. I remember thinking that that was incredibly unfair, so I filed it under the "When I'm a parent, I won't do that" category (didn't everyone make one of those growing up?). Well... yesterday was the big day at our house; and I realized (again) that I hate report cards. They weren't necessarily "bad" report cards either, they just weren't great; and if I'm going to pay over $2000 every month in tuition - I want great! Ironically, the son who struggles the most, got fantastic academic grades; but his behavior marks weren't so good -- And I'm much more interested in a "good kid, than a smart kid." 2 of the other reports were OK, sorta. Again, the behavior marks were pretty embarrassing. But my brightest, gifted child - while he's still on the "honor roll;" he went down in EVERY SINGLE subject. So, tonight for dinner I'm cooking (which in and of itself is a big deal)... we're having steaks, veggies, their favorite gourmet potatoes, peaches with peanut butter, bread and soda to wash it all down (which is a BIG deal since they can only have soda on Saturdays usually), and I'll make sure I'm not in a bad mood... even though... I'm in a pretty bad mood because - I hate report cards; and by God, they better do better next semester!
Posted by 4funboys at 5:34 PM 0 comments
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Love My Job

I have the best job in the world! Not many people can say they love their jobs, and I know I'm blessed. Tuesday was my first day back in class, and I was greeted with the enthusiastic hugs and smiles of 20 six-year-olds who were happy to see me (unlike my own boys' reaction, who were more sad to see their cousins and auntie M go home than they were happy to see us back - go figure-- except of course, my baby). Every year I get way too attached to these kids; but it's hard to not get "too involved." I'm a lot better than I used to be, much to my husband's relief. I don't cry nearly as much in my frustration of not being able to fix many of their circumstances. When I hear their heartbreaking stories now, I've accepted that sometimes - all I really can do is give them a hug and a smile; and then I remember that that's probably the only one that they'll get that day. I also remind myself that that's what they do for me every day - and just how much I LOVE IT. One of my "favorite" kids told me today that he's moving and I'm really bummed about it. He's going to Oakland and "it's dangerous there. My auntie got shot there, but she's not dead; so we're moving back." He's "only a little scared to go there" -- I can't imagine why. These kids have seen so much, have lived through more in their short lives than I could have ever dreamed of before working there. I wonder why God chose me to be born into the great family that I'm in. Why am I so blessed? I'll never really know down here, but it's going to be one of my first questions to Him when I see. Until then, I'm eternally grateful - and pray my boys will grow up feeling as blessed as I do.